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Monday, May 2, 2016

So long, fair Twinkie

Saturday, November 17, 2012

When NFL refs go on strike, games are badly called for a few weeks.

When Chicago teachers go on strike, schoolchildren get a little more time on the playground.

When the NBA goes on strike, Christmas dinner is spent with an orange ball bouncing in the background.

The problem was that after a period of time, everyone chilled out and things returned to their usual way of running.

Not surprisingly, workers at Hostess thought the same timeline of events was scheduled for them. Because, as we all know, the quickest way to get a raise is to join a union and then refuse to go into work until your paycheck grows substantially.

Pardon me for laughing a little.

Not even threats of liquidation could slow these Hostess workers down. They needed more money, and they were going to strike until they got it. Screw overtime or weekend pay.

Well, let's just say it backfired.

To quote the website, "Hostess brands to wind down company after BCTGM Union strike cripples operations."

To put it plainly: They struck themselves to death. Or, in a word I prefer, they smote themselves.

So, sorry to say, our favorite sack lunch treats have now gone to the big sugar high in the sky. And we will miss them for this.

Somewhere out there, Little Debbie is torn. On the one hand, she lost a dear friend this week. On the other, America turns to her alone to supply millions of children with their individually-wrapped brownies and creme-filled treats. Plus, it's Christmas time, which means tree-shaped mini-cakes.

So farewell, Wonder Bread, Twinkie, and Ding Dong. May you rest in peace.

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Kate Padilla