*This was sent to me by a friend, thought I would share it. Can't claim it as my original thought, but whoever came up with it, thank you!
I am a member of golf's lower 99%.
I am an indifferent golfer, and there's no way I could ever make it to the professional level. Never put in the practice time to be the best. Never had the shots, skills, or mental toughness to make it in the sport. I just never felt like working all that hard at it.
However, I feel I should be paid by the top 1% of golfers for what I do. It isn't fair that those players who have worked harder, have studied the game, have better equipment and are more skilled and dedicated should make all that BIG money.
Where's my share? I'm a Victim!
The top 1% should pay for my club memberships and green fees and lessons, buy me new clubs, balls, clothes and shoes, and pay me some of their winnings. They can afford it. They are The Rich.
The whole system should be changed to accommodate people like me. Let's occupy a golf course and demand that those who are better at what they do pay for us who generally suck.
Whining should get us something, like the cover of Time Magazine and public sympathy! Maybe a law or two from legislators who want our votes.
*I will be waiting for the government to come to my aid as I assure you I will qualify for all assistance as a hack golfer. Tiger Woods is keeping me down!