Daycare 101

Sounds wierd from a guy that gives ya heck from time to time, but do you have any openings?

Did you see the results of this study that were released today?

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/con...

I overall agree with what you are saying. But at the same time, I only work part time. I would never be able to afford paying for a full-time spot and only using some of it. Affording double pay for daycare during a vacation week (paying regular provider AND backup) might be a stretch, too. Remember, not everybody gets paid vacation! A lot of people are much worse off than we are and couldn't possibly afford what you propose. It's not necessarily because they don't care about their children or are greedy for material possessions. If it's a choice between paying the rent and paying for a daycare spot that they aren't using, what do you expect people to do?

I am SO lucky to have a registered daycare provider that is willing to work with my goofy schedule. I hope that she continues to do daycare until my child is old enough to stay home by herself!

haha, you would deem us incompatible huh....that's great. You bloggers are great entertainment.

WorkingMom1 - do you deduct your vacation days that you are not using your house from your mortgage? Do you deduct days that your car is not being used from your insurance or from your car payment? What about your health insurance? Do you pay that premium every year even if you don't use it? Daycare is the same thing. Maybe I should call it your daycare premium. How important are your children?

I think there is a balance between the best for the children and the best interest of the family as a whole. I'm relieved to be speaking from the perspective of a parent whose days of having children in daycare is behind her.

Compare it to college. Yes, in college our "children" are young adults and responsible for their own safety, their own learning and their own decisions. The parallel is that many of the "best" options are not necessarily affordable, and in some cases, just because parents "can" send their children to an expensive school, doesn't mean they should or will.

My cousin lives in the Washington, DC area and makes a quite fine living in engineering. His parents paid for whatever college he and his brothers could manage to stay in for more than a year before being dismissed for poor grades/ majoring in beer and pot. They were certainly spoken to about their excessive partying, but it took three different colleges before the rug was pulled out and my cousin joined the Navy.

Twenty-five years later, my cousin is raising his children. I was shocked to learn he had a budget in paying for their college -- a total over which he would not pay. If his daughter and son want to attend a more expensive college, they will have to find the money themselves, regardless of what the finance office claims is his "expected contribution." Perhaps his own experience educated this decision, but I still find it rather amusingly hypocritical.

On the other hand, it may be a wise decision in the face of exponentially climbing tuition rates.

Sorry to hijack the thread, but I can see a parallel between paying for the highest quality daycare and paying for the highest quality college. Not everyone has the circumstances to go to Grinnell or Hamline or St. Olaf or another immensely expensive college in this region.

My cousin's daughter is attending the bargain basement James Madison University in Virginia instead of nearby Georgetown, Duke or UVA because she chooses to stay within her budget and not accumulate college debt.

And not everyone has the circumstances to pay top dollar for daycare, nor can they justify half or more of one parent's paycheck going to daycare expense.

I'm not saying the provider needs to change a thing. I'm just saying everyone sets their own priorities, often based on a larger picture than "my child deserves the best."

Once again you are posting another blog putting someone down because they don't do exactly what you think they should do. I am a mother of two wonderful boys who mean the world to me. They go to a daycare provider who is not registered with the state, but I am willing to bet my annual salary that they are receiving the utmost care by my WONDERFUL daycare provider. Having a piece of paper from the state does not guarantee that you will be the perfect fit for me. Perhaps you are assuming that people are not choosing you because of your cost when in fact they are not choosing you because they don't think you are the right fit for their children. I'm not saying that you don't do your job well - I'm just saying that there are others out there that may do just as well (or even better) than you.

Also, why put down parents for choosing a daycare provider because of cost? If I had two daycare providers to choose from that had equal skills in raising my children, chances are likely that I would choose the provider that costs less. Why? By spending less on daycare I can spend more on the other costs that are associated with having children. We all live on a budget Leah - hence the reason Wal-Mart is packed on a daily basis.

Instead of assuming that parents aren't thinking of their children when they choose a cheaper daycare provider, take some time to think about why they may need that cheaper provider. Not everyone can afford the expensive providers, but that does not mean that they don't love or value their children as much as those who do pay the extra money for daycare.

My esteemed friend WorkingMom1 says:

I also have to state that when I was choosing daycare for my children, I specifically looked for an individual that was NOT state certified.

That is where I start to part ways. While I have not seen state certification as the major factor in a child care decision, I do like that they are mandatory reporters, have child and infant CPR training, and meet certain safety standards. Other providers, of course might meet and exceed those standards on their own, so I'm not saying only state-certified providers meet that standard.

If you do not have a state certified child care provider, and possibly even if you do, I would strongly suggest a criminal background check -- nationwide if possible.

In 2003 I placed an ad for a provider to come to my home. My husband left early for remodeling jobs. I had to leave around 8 to get to my job and the older kids could not be on their school property until 8:15. I also had an infant for whom I wanted in-home care. So, this provider would care for my infant and drive the older kids to and from school. I also said if she had time to do some light housework, that would be great, but only if baby took a good nap and it was definitely not a priority.

She came with great references from out of town and seemed to have a great deal of experience. The kids liked her okay. I found it odd and a bit annoying that she would start cleaning the table, doing dishes, sweeping the kitchen, etc. as I was trying to pack my lunch and get out the door. I also found a few other things odd, but nothing in and of itself to get excited about. I tried to be a good, considerate employer and didn't want to make a big deal of something that wasn't.

A friend told me she saw the woman at Wal-mart more than once passing my baby off as her own. I questioned my friend (my BEST friend) as to how she could know this for sure. My friend said she hadn't actually heard the words, but she really thought something was fishy.

It turned out not only was the woman claiming my baby was hers, but she was making plans to leave her fiance, go back to the east coast to be with another man and really thought she was going to take my baby and raise it as theirs. As if we would every have stopped searching for our boy. As if people wouldn't think it odd. As if she wouldn't get caught.

Luckily, she abruptly quit after I told her to please let us know if she was going to be running errands with the baby during the day and to please do her cleaning jobs after hours.

An after-the-fact criminal background check showed a child abuse case in a distant state just two years prior, and a current case of domestic violence and fraud against her then-fiance.

We absolutely dodged a bullet by the grace of God and by the courage of her fiance, whose disability checks she was defrauding him out of, for coming forward.

I'm not sure what my deal is with hijacking the discussion and I apologize for any inconvenience it causes. It looks like people are mostly ignoring any non sequitors anyway.

I do agree, Leah, that you are a professional and your service is valuable: to provide a safe, loving, learning, fun environment for the children in your care. I'm happy you're open to diversity, possibly caring for Adam's daughter if that all works out.

Amy--Just to clarify

I would agree with you on the other requirements!! I love that I can get all of the positives of being with a registered provider and none of the negatives!! Our provider is CPR and first aid certified, she has taken the mandatory reporter classes through the state. She has everything to get registered, but has chosen not to be certified on purpose!

What a horrific experience you had with your nanny!! I don't even know what I would've done in that situation!! Thank God you all came out of it unscathed!

Leah, in my experience, you don't need to pay a Tiffany's price for a provider worth his/her weight in gold. Less expense does not always mean lower quality.

There is no $ that you can put on your children or their care. It's a "to each their own" decision for the type of daycare you use and I for one am thankful for all those out there providing exceptional daycare. It puts my mind at ease when I work during the day to not have to worry about my daughter. She is happy & well-cared for and that is really all that matters.